Pablo's Top Five Cats In Professional Wrestling

Hey all you upright cats.

It’s your reigning, purring and defending Cultaholic Heavyweight Champion, Pablo Escocatto.

Since I’m defending my title this Sunday against Mr Happy and Todd The Rabbit, I thought I’d take this time to abuse my authority as Champ and write the list you REALLY want to see: celebrating the Master Moggies Of The Mat.

Here’s is my countdown of the Top Five Cats In Pro Wrestling.

Join us. Meow.

5. “Big Cat” Ernie Ladd

Now THIS was a Tough Tabby!

The story goes that when Big Cat was a football player he was challenged to a wrestling workout and the rest, as they say, is history.

We sadly lost him in 2004 but his memory lives forever in multiple football and wrestling Halls Of Fame.  He was a giant, but I bet he’d give really good scritches behind the ears if you asked him nicely.

4. The Kat/Miss Kitty

WWE.com

In 1999, Chyna adopted Miss Kitty from Jeff Jarrett and she grew from a Kitten to a Cat before our very eyes.

That year, she won the WWF Women’s Championship in an Evening Gown Pool Match, proving how dangerous us cats are when we get wet!

I don’t see why people got so upset with what happened after that match: cats walk around naked all the time (except that time when Tom made me wear a silly bow tie for New Year’s Eve!)

3. Ernest “The Cat” Miller

WWE.com

Like all the finest fighting felines, Ernest Miller had lightning-quick reactions, always landed on his feet and was constantly meowing for his Momma.

Karate Champion and dancefloor hot-stepper Miller won the right to be WCW Commissioner in 2000 becoming the most decorated cat to hold a political position since my mate Larry of Number 10 Downing Street.

I wonder if anybody did indeed call his mother in the end?

2. Allie Kat

Scratching and clawing out of Indiana, this kitty is tearing up the American Independent scene like it was a scratching post!

Allie Kat is known to accept pets and scratches behind the ear during combat, but play too rough and you’ll feel the full force of the LariKat.

If you’re one of the hairless creatures going to WrestleMania this year check out Allie Kat’s show as part of GCW’s The Collective Remix. Grey sweatpants are the new cat’s pyjamas!

Honourable Mention: The Mumbai Cats

IMPACT Wrestling

What’s better than ONE Mumbai Cat? How about TWO!

These two lesser-spotted Green Shorthairs were part of TNA Wrestling’s short-lived Indian wrestling promotion Ring Ka King, coming up short in the tournament to crown the first tag team champions.

They were brothers named “Mumbai Cat 1” and “Mumbai Cat 2”, so clearly they had a mum with very little imagination.  After a brief run in TNA they disappeared forever. Hopefully they found a Cat Shelter and are getting snuggles and Dreamies all day long.

1. BattleKat

WWE.com

A real Catch-As-Catch-Can Kitten, Battle Kat debuted for the WWF in 1990.

He was quick, agile and didn’t ONCE get caught scratching the sofa. So why he disappeared just a few months after his debut without even a SNIFF of WWF gold is, frankly, anybody’s guess.

I read on WrestleCrap that Battle Kat wasn’t a real cat at all. It was a human in disguise! However you shouldn’t believe everything you read on the Internet. Meow.